It was kind of cute, in an annoying mind your own fucking business, sort of way.  Here I was carrying another member of the party in front of me, on the horse.   At least Merlin wasn't dead drunk and snoring loudly.  It even bothered Cammi, she flew for a while, and Illie was all, let me hold Luke for you a married woman shouldn't have her arms wrapped around another man.  Now that was just plain stupid, one I just wasn't married and two Illie's the better fighter.  Although Luke mentioned some very handy fireball spells, so I'm just going to have to give learning those a try.

We eventually found Gerard.  A big strong man who still had a little hope in his eyes.  We explained who we are, and that's when I figured out why Luke was drinking.  Apparently his father is Brand.  That's quite a cross to bear.   Cecilly gave him quite a look after that revelation.  We all went around the circle telling our stories.  Once again, I was struck by how much I didn't really fit in.  Nope, don't have a dad.  I'm not an experience fighter (although, the alligators I've wrestled would argue).  And then Gerard mentioned his plan for Random.  He wanted to talk to Random's wife Vialle who lives in a place called Rebma.   He mentioned her several more times while the whole group assiduously looked away from me.  They were making me as uncomfortable, as the whole idea of having just been sleeping with a man, who had lost his memory trying to get back to his kingdom and his wife.  There were several more uncomfortable silences.  On our ride back to the castle I thought about them.  My thoughts were broken for a bit my the happy return of Fletcher.  I'd missed his odd accent for a bit. 

As we travelled back towards the castle, I could see how devasted the place looked.  Stone walls were hastily refortified with patchwork rubble.  Some houses burned to the ground.  And not nearly enough smoke rising from the chimneys.     I thought about it some more, and thought somewhat cowardly that I didn't really want to be here for Random's happy reunion.  And then I realized I did have access to an army.  An army of very tough winged fighters.  Very tough winged fighters who wanted to help defend Amber.  And some of them even thought that I might be the key to bringing them back.